Throughout the past three years, despite all the things happening in between, somehow I feel like I always go back to liking the same person. The one girl I have no chance with. Not being pessimistic, just realistic. Even after every time I finally get over her, find a reason to move on, I end up right back with my sights set on her. I don't know why, but she's just always fun to be with, never makes me feel unwanted. Whenever I'm down, she's probably one of my favorite person to talk to. She'll always try to make me feel better and never seems to judge me for anything. I don't think I've ever had an un-enjoyable time with her. Including yesterday. The chats we had during the drive was fun like all the other ones we have had in the past. It's never anything really special, but they're always nice.
I like these intimate one-on-one times together. Not just with her, but with anyone. They're so much more meaningful than being with thirty people but not really given the opportunity to have an extraordinary time with any one person. I obviously value different things in friendships than many other people, but I think I'd much rather have a few great friends than a ton not good ones.
Anyway, back to her. A few days ago I wrote about having someone who can take my breath away. After dropping her off yesterday, seeing her wave and her bright smile from her door made me want to smile back just as big.
She's...
...awesome.
I just wish I had a chance.
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